GUIDELINES FOR INTERACTING WITH OTHERS IN A HOUSE CHURCH MEETING

by Bob Sears
presented at the House2House Conference in Dallas, Texas 9/07

1. Before you arrive, prayerfully prepare yourself to share and to learn from others. Anticipate the Lord using them to minister to you, and you to them.
2. Use the Bible as your primary source and authority when you speak or evaluate what someone else shares. As valuable as they are, your thoughts and opinions are not always God's.

"All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the person of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work." (2 Timothy 3:16-17)

3. Don't worry about "doing a good job" or being polished. Just try to stay focused on loving others in Jesus' name. As Paul instructs: "Do all things for the edification of the body." Your spiritual gifts are more likely to get expressed in God's way if you concentrate on caring about people.
4. Listen to what others share as though the Spirit of God may be speaking (and seeking to bless you) through them. But don't "swallow whole" everything you hear; take responsibility to evaluate the spiritual value and accuracy of what they say.

"Do not stifle the Holy Spirit or scoff at prophecies; test everything that is said." (1 Thessalonian 5:19-20)

5. Don't just sit there: respond to what people share. Acknowledge and appreciate them. If it's appropriate, offer some feedback, add an idea or ask a clarifying question.
6. Use periods of silence to pray and "listen" for the Holy Spirit's leading or guidance. Resist the urge to rush in and fill the gaps.
7. When you sense the Spirit may be prompting you to share, do so when an opportunity presents itself. Just make sure the person who was sharing before you is completely finished. Raise your hand or tactfully ask them if you're not sure.
8. Be personal and share from your heart. We love the real you.
9. Be brief when you share. Restrict your comments to a few sentences at a time so you're not monopolizing or dominating, and so others feel free to contribute. Just because you think something doesn't mean you have to say it all —at least not right then. When you're offering a prepared "gift," try and keep it to seven or eight minutes, maximum. If you're going to need longer, ask the group before you begin and make sure it's okay.
10. Encourage others to participate who tend to be more hesitant or thoughtful. Draw them out.

"Those parts of the body that seem to be weaker are indispensable, and the parts that we think are less honorable we (should) treat with special honor..." (1 Corinthians 12:22-23)

11. Decision-making should usually include everyone who will be affected by the outcome. All proposals and opinions should be respectfully considered, then a vote taken. The issue is not resolved until a consensus is reached that everyone can support (even though a small minority might still hold a dissenting position).
12. If you disagree with someone, do so in a gracious, humble way and sincerely seek to reach agreement with them.

    "Be diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. (Ephesians 4:3)

13. Take the initiative to kindly say something if someone (or the group) seriously strays from one of these guidelines.